A Letter #7

 I do not know if you will read this bullcrap or not.

I just want to say sorry.

It must be really hard to deal with someone who is as stubborn as me.

I mean, i stubborn. Very stubborn.

My stubborn level is probably beyond anyone imagination.

A paranoid stubborn.

I feared a lot of fear.

I keep doing the same mistake.

I let my fears eat my logic.

I let my fears swallow my heart.

Blinds the fvck out of me.

I'm so sorry.

You made me believe in allah again.

You made me stop hating or complaining to allah again.

You made me love allah again.

I am still in need of your help on doing it.

Because you are part of me that have been missing... Faith

I will need your help.

I will seek allah for enlightenment and forgiveness

And as you suggested... I shall do istiqarah, sujud, tasbih, taubah, and tahajud.

I feel guilty because it seems like i come to allah when i needed allah not knowing that i always needs allah.

Allah remaining of it by sending you to me to always reminded me.

I love you.

My heart will always belongs to you.


To my love.

Best regard

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